Most self-help and New Age spiritualism books often emphasize the importance of being present. Have you tried this? In my experience, it is extraordinarily difficult to achieve.
I spent a week surveying conversations I had with people—over 20 in total—and more than 95% of these discussions fell into two categories: the past and the future. Being present was hard to find.
I decided to let go of trying to be present throughout the entire day because it only led to frustration. I thought, how can I do this?
The first incremental action I took was with my phone, recognizing it was responsible for many distractions and a problem since I could rarely put it down. One day, I was at a Korean food truck waiting for my takeout order and had 15 minutes to myself. I tossed the phone in the glove box of my car and started walking, determined to gaze at anything that caught my attention. I saw a fountain and a shady park.
I stood in the park, looking up at the trees and observing the variety of colors and shapes of the leaves shimmering in the sunlight. After ten years of passing by this park each week, I had never noticed how many varieties of maple trees there were. Then, I experienced a gentle joy and awe inspired by the leaves. My gaze wandered to the architecture and the speed of passing cars. This continued until I heard, "David!" as the chef held my takeout order.
The only way I could manage to be present was to get rid of my phone and start walking. The present moment lasted five minutes or less, but it left a significant impression on me. I was smiling, feeling grateful, and my mood lifted. It was worth the effort to be present. I’m a fan of the incremental approach to change, and this was a fine example of trying to be present for a minute or two and testing the result. It was worth it.
You too can do what I did: stare at leaves. Or perhaps it is your beloved pet you simply observe being a dog or a cat. Watch a child being a child as you quietly observe. You get the idea—there is no right or wrong way to be present in a moment.
While I’m not sure I impacted 95% of my life, I can say that engaging in the 5% was fulfilling and gave back a disproportionate return of good feelings that lasted a while.
What’s your 5%?
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